Backstory
well i guess i might as well start with when I moved to New Jersey in 3rd grade. I had the worst teacher you could possibly give a 3rd grader, she gave me lunch detention every day and I went home in tears the first day and every day following. That was the beginning, but I didn’t see anything wrong with myself. The next year in fourth grade, I had a teacher who was sweet as sugar and I must say she was the best teacher I’ve ever had. 3rd grade was the year I began to feel numb, everyday felt the same, nothing was special anymore. I didn’t realize this was a bad thing, i thought I was just being silly because that’s what everyone told me, they thought I was saying these things for attention. So that year goes by and now it’s 5th grade. I started to force myself into feeling emotions that year because I was starting to get scared; that’s when I introduced myself to having bipolar disorder. In the middle of 5th grade, my parents began to fight, and it started as a little tension but that grew with time which leads us into 6th grade. This was the year that I started riding, and also the year the fighting was bad, and I mean really bad. I started to hide my emotions which was how I came across what is call borderline personality disorder; to everyone else I was happy and cheery, but when it was just me, I was just numb. 6th grade was the year my parents filed for divorce, but didn’t go through with it. Now on to 7th grade. This was a weird year I guess, don’t remember much of it actually. All I remember of it was that I moved with my mom and siblings to a town house and my dad was living somewhere else; 1/2 way through 7th grade my dad moved in with us and things were ok. 7th grade I was riding at cavesson corners with a woman named Judy, and she taught me so much about horses and how to take care of them. Than just when I thought everything was actually going to be alright, 8th grade rolled around. I was still numb. We moved back into the house and the fighting came back like never before. Restraining orders and more files
Comments
Heem08 says,
I admire your courage. You're right it is never too late change. Thanks for sharing.