Will keep my promises to myself.
BackstoryA couple of weeks ago I tried - unsuccesfully - to finish one of those daily experiments coming often into my mind but rarely reaching its end. Most part of them have to do with writing. Usually, it happens almost the same: the idea sprung, I am enthusiastic, start planing the content of the future book or article - everything looks wonderful and I am energized - and continue to do so for a while - maby hours, or I am back in the next days. Some of those projects are already finished - a couple of different kind of books. But, most part of them are not and I am constantly striving to convince myself that I really should finish somehow. And probably I will, as writing is the only thing I fully enjoy doing in my life.
In the case of this last experiment, it was about recording by writing four days of self-imposed and self-induced happiness. Describing with my own words the efforts of discovering the wonderful part of every moments for four days. As the beginning of another uncountless days of quiet smiles. And, in fact, it worked for, almost two days. Not fully happy, I must confess, as there were still a couple of small stupids details shadowing my moments: maybe some unexpected "to do", or some phone calls disturbing the quiet atmosphere, or some negative attitudes of people around me. After the almost two days, I forgot about writing, but I was still forcing myself to see the bright side of things.
And, in some respect, I continue to remember sometimes about this, in the middle of the nervous storm with not always very clear causes but with obvious troubling consequences for my aims of serenity.
I am not a fan of "resolutions" or most precisely, "new year resolutions", as any "new year" could begin at any time, depending upon the various stages of my lifetime - relocation in a new place, a new project I am starting to work on etc. But, if to make a wish, it will be one about keeping my own promises, as for example, of smiling more and being more happy with myself and those around me. Sounds pathetic, but very often we need simple days with simple raws of light.