Not how I planned Sunday morning.
Backstory
Initially frustrating, and maybe still so. Call it a "modern family headache."I had this wonderful plan for today when my ex throws a wrench in it this morning with a request he could've made at least a week ago. And, because I value the time he spends with the kids (sometimes, it feels, more than he does), I begin the juggle. Child #1's plans adapt only slightly; Child #2's plans cut out the relaxation time to make time with dad, and I have to change transportation arrangements for him. Child #3's plans for today move earlier, and her plans for Tuesday have to be cancelled (grrrr) so I can be available for Child #1, 2.
What do I get out of this? Child #2 yells at me for being stressed this morning. Child #1 is apologetic (which she doesn't need to be) and Child #3 is oblivious... for now.
Plus I adapted all my plans for today, and lost several hours with my kids.
But, hey, I got a "Thanks" via text from the ex. He has no idea what I juggled -- probably doesn't care. He got what he wanted, and I am sure that there is some way whatever I have done will be inadequate. (history tells me this is true)
I wonder if this morning's scenario is a sign that I am too inflexible or too nice. I don't know; but either way, I find myself pondering if there's something wrong with me. And I feel like I probably shouldn't feel that way.
by lillybrook in Six-Word Momoirs on Jan 27, 2013 | 
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Comments
jl333 says,
Nothing, in my opinion is more important than kids spending time with their father. Your good nature kicked in, canceled your own plans to be accommodating, and that my friend, speaks volumes!!!JAD says,
ditto jl333. lillybrook you have a big heart!lillybrook says,
Thanks. Just what I didn't know that I needed to hear!Dragonflower says,
Sometimes it is good to be flexible. Only you know if today was that or if he was just pulling something he does too often (last minute plans).My last marriage failed quickly because the child custody arrangement was so rigid. (his child custody for his kids). There was never any flexibility and me and my daughter felt over-powered and over-looked. In life some stuff just happens and flexibility helps.
You sound like an excellent mom to me, and I couldn't begin to follow your schedule! Please don't let anyone make you think you are inadequate cuz you're not!
lillybrook says,
Co-parenting is such a delicate dance. But I think I made the right choice on Sunday, even though there clearly was a little of that "pulling something he does too often" thing. Thanks for the comment; I love, love, love being Mom.