Six Word Memoirs on Life Stories

Dragonflower says,

In California we have laws for teenage drivers that change the longer they drive. Its been awhile since I had a teenage driver, but if I remember right, its no passengers until you've been driving for X amount of time, driving after a certain time of night, ect. Is it like that where you are too?

I was so nervous when my daughter first started driving. I can't even begin to tell you! And to let her ride with someone else that wasn't her dad or me, forget about it! She was annoyed with me for years! And annoyed is putting it nicely!

Now I trust her completely and prefer her to drive me everywhere. everywhere. I started feeling like that since she was about 18. It wasn't so much age, as that she just demonstrated what a good driver she was and responsible. I still wasn't so confident about her friends though!

This is one of those things you won't understand until you have a teenage driver of your own, sorry to say! Maybe by the it really will finally be like the Jetsons and driving will be easier! I know it is hard and I sympathize with your frustration, but side with your mom's intuition about your friend.

L2L3 says,

Comfortable in the car with one or on a sidewalk near a car with one driving? Would rather be in the car.

Dragonflower says,

I meant NO driving after a certain time of night. I realize I may be overly cautious, but when I was a teenager, we didn't have such rules. We barely had seatbelts. Seriously. We played the radio loud and crammed in way too many people into a car. And the dogs sometimes too! I literally cringe when I think about that. Hopefully, you'll be able to find transportation to events that meets your mom's approval.

MO_Thoughts2 says,

We have graduated licenses here too. My teenaged daughter (17) drives and has went with people. She's allowed to go with her friends, but I prefer it's just her and the friend. But the exception has been made -- depends on the friend and where they are going / time of day. She had a tutoring class that she rode with 5 other students driven by one of the students (in a minivan). Main thing is she has to check in via text when they arrive at their location & when they are heading home on social outings. On the other side, if I'm not comfortable her riding with a certain person, I will shuffle her back and forth if she wants to attend the function.

jl333 says,

Sorry Hannah...I have to side with your Mom on this one, except for, if I were your mother, I would have dropped you off at the game. I see too many teenage kids texting and driving, being distracted by other teens in the car, and kids goofing off to loud music while driving. They don't quite have the experience to make a split decision should something suddenly arise. That, and your Mom doesn't know if your friend was out partying the night before, if she got good adequate sleep, etc. it's because your Mom loves you Hannah, that she said no to going with your friend

Dragonflower says,

Hieronimo, I somewhat agree with you. What happens though, in my thinking process, is I don't want my loved one to be the one that might die so others may enjoy their liberties. And, I also don't want your loved one to be the one either. Ultimately, I don't want anyone's loved one to be the casualty of my insisting upon my liberties. But I do want my liberties and don't want to be overly regulated. I already over-regulate myself enough as it is. I semi over-regulated my daughter as a teenager. She would probably take the "semi" out of my sentence! I erred on the side of caution even before the new driver laws were in effect. I will admit, I was happy when they were invented because then I ceased to be the total "bad guy". The California Vehicle code took over that for me in a sense.

I have a neighbor who isn't really elderly, but she has become a dangerous driver. She drives way too slow and will just stop in the middle of the street if there is something that she wants to see. She feels she has this right since she thinks she knows what she is doing. I stopped riding with her because the risk was too great for me. But she is still driving. I'm not sure what my point is about her, except maybe this is what Hannahmo's mom is just trying to avoid. Having her be in a car with someone like my neighbor. But, H, and here's where your point is well taken, she could be in the car with her mom and that same bad driver is still out there.

So, we try to be careful without going overboard. I believe Hannahmo's mom is trying very hard to make a good and reasonable call for this time. There will be other times, for other decisions. Thanks for helping me to think more deeply about my own response over this question, H.

marymc says,

My niece just got her license. Upstate NY, you have been warned.

Hannahmo says,

Thanks for all the thoughtful comments everybody! Yes I know my mom was just trying to look out for me but sometimes I wish she would loosen her grip a little bit. Hopefully she'll drive me to the next game. :)

ba_miracle says,

More comfortable after they've been driving longer;-) It takes practice to do most things well.
My daughter wasn't allowed to ride with friends as a teen.
Hannahmo, be patient with your mom she really is looking out for you and you seem to be turning out very well. She just wants you to survive being a teenager ;-).

lillybrook says,

Hannah - I wish you'd made it to the game, but I'd trust your mom's judgement on this one. My daughter is a driver, and very rarely is she allowed to drive friends and she's a very safe driver, also driving over a year. And I honestly can't think of a time that I've let another teen drive her somewhere.

accidentaltourist says,

In the grand scheme of things, a year is a very short time of experience for a driver. Especially a teen driver who may only drive to the occasional game or school function. Do the math: the adult who drives to work every day might average 5 hours of driving per week, and in one year that person still has only amassed just over 1800 hours behind the wheel. For the teen who drives a mere 1 or 2 times a week, the short distance to an event...considerably less.

No matter how careful the driver, lack of experience will still be a factor when the unforeseen raises its ugly head. Your momma loves you...keeping you whole has been her goal for all of your life, and she takes that job very seriously, I'm sure. We mothers are like that. :)

AQScott says,

My two teen drivers are not allowed to be driven by any other teens...a family rule...there's a reason that car insurance rates are the way they are...teen brains aren't fully developed yet...teens think they're invincible, but they're not, and this has been illustrated by too many tragedies...I'm with your parents...and EVERYONE, PLEASE put your cell phones out of "temptation range" while driving :)

kathi_wright says,

and one more mom-in-the-mix to comment... i was probably overprotective with my daughter; o.k. no 'probably'....i was, and can only half-way kiddingly call myself a smother...

i wanted her to be safe and i wouldn't let her drive with other teenagers, either. i would have taken her to the game, though, or transported her where she needed to be if i could. i am also in california, and agree with dragon empress that the laws took some of the sting out of my rule against driving with another teen.

a former student at my school, who would have graduated this spring, was killed in a car accident this past october; he was a front-seat passenger in a car driven by another teen who had been drinking.

the stuff of nightmares for parents, hannahmo. and what our rules, which sometimes seem unreasonable, are trying to prevent.

cell phones, texting, alcohol.... just make wise choices and be safe and know that your mama has your back....