Six Word Memoirs on Life Stories

marymc says,

Last week.

ba_miracle says,

The day after getting removed from my first foster-home when they left my little brother behind and put me back in the children's shelter.
There were 30 other girls in the room and I never felt more alone.

Bullitt says,

Mary, why? What happened?

Bullitt says,

H and BA, how did you cope? Where did you find comfort?

marymc says,

Last week I moved my parents into a nursing home. My sister-in-law helped that day but the day after, she went on vacation with my brother. I had to get rid of the rest of their things, deriving comfort from strangers who answered Craig's List ads. When the furniture was all gone, I checked into a hotel for 3 days to be near my folks and help them make the transition. Then I flew 3000 miles home.

marymc says,

hieroniomo and ba_miracle, my heart goes out to you.

Bullitt says,

Mary, I'm sure your parents were so grateful you made time to help them. Although I'm sure it wasn't easy, you probably feel good knowing you made them a priority.

Bullitt says,

H, I'm sorry you went through that difficult time feeling so alone. It's comforting to know you came out on the other side of it.

SingerSomewhere says,

The many times my dad had heart attacks when I was a kid. Even though I was in a crowded waiting room at the hospital, I felt so alone and helpless. Also when one of my friends died in 7th grade and another killed himself in 8th.

Marymc, Hieronimo, and ba_miracle: I'm sorry you went through all that.

Bullitt says,

Singer, I'm sorry--so much grief for one small person. Again, I find myself wondering how your made it through it.

When I wrote this question, (as usual) I didn't think ahead to the responses it might ellicit. If people are answering, the question needed to be asked.

Bullitt says,

Heironimo, thank you for your kind words.

Interestingly, I saw that you recently responded to the question about "a Six unjustly neglected." Strangely, I was going to respond with one of my own memoirs, a long-ago memoir that you just randomly favorited today, apparently out of the blue. You must have been in my cosmic bathtub, friend.

Bullitt says,

Ha! I just realized that you wrote that question!

DynamicDbytheC says,

My heart goes out to all of the above. I never felt so alone as when the only person who ever loved me unconditionally, my hubby of 28+ years, was in ICU fighting for his life. He did not recognize me for 2 days. Coming home to a house that we remodeled and designed together was a constant reminder of him.

Bullitt says,

DDbtC, I can't begin to imagine what you are going through. We all see that you have a lot of personal strength. Stay strong, lady!

Bullitt says,

It's only fair I answer my own question.

The time I felt most alone was after the love of my life left me to head back out West, to my beloved Colorado.

We had just moved to Wisconsin, a place we relocated to so she could "get back to the land." I was never in love with the W-I, but she was sick, and we had hoped the move would heal her.

But now she was gone, and here I was, hauling hay bales and stuck in Small Town, America.

I never thought I would get rid of that hole in my chest.

Wench says,

When great-grandmother died. We had this after-funeral party at her house and people were laughing and making jokes and I know they all missed her terribly but I didn't understand why they weren't showing it. I was sixteen. I crawled into the closet in the back bedroom and cried. My mom's cousin found me and she was crying, too.

Wench says,

This is a hard question. There have been so many times I've felt completely alone. I think the other biggest one was when I walked out onto a friend's roof. I kept saying, out loud, that I needed to go back inside but something prevented me and I stood on the edge for a long time before I heard someone laughing inside and turned back.

NumbrOneAunt says,

bullitt, i hesitated to comment on this because my story seemed so...relatively easy compared to what others who've commented have gone through or are going through. it was really tough for me when my mom died because we were very close, but i didn't feel alone because i had family and friends who helped me. like you, i felt the most alone when the love of my life left me. did you ever get rid of the hole in your chest?

Bullitt says,

Wench, I can picture your moments perfectly--the vulnerability and the exposure. Picturing you on the roof is particularly powerful. Tell us more.

A common thread with all of these responses is that feeling alone has very little to do with actually and physically being alone. Duh, I guess.

It makes me want to ask the follow-up question, "When have you felt most beloved, protected, safe, etc.

Bullitt says,

NOA, that hole in my chest has finally filled up--not with the Love of my Life but rather with my much more important Lifetime Love.

As it turned out, the Love of my Life was actually my Great, Ruinous Love--a woman I couldn't possibly be with for the long haul.

How about you? Have you filled up the hole of aloneness? If not now, someday I hope.

Believe says,

After a break up. I chose not to share the true reason for the break up with my friends and family for fear they would urge me to file charges on him. Or worse, my teen brother would try to take revenge. At the time, I did not want to press charges. I wanted everything that I was feeling to end. After a summer of wearing long pants and turtleneck sweaters my body healed. Took so much longer for my mind to follow suit. There were lots of lonely those days.

ba_miracle says,

Bullitt.
I didn’t cope. It was raining outside and the playground was empty. I went outside and sat on a big metal dome to cry in peace and try to find a way out. I wondered where I was in relation to getting back to that house and “taking” my brother but shortly realized that being alone wasn’t allowed and getting out of there wasn’t going to be that simple.
Life before that moment had been full of difficulties, fear, abuse and loss but that was the final moment... I had lost trust or respect for authority and had no hope or faith in God even.
My behavior after that created many unsafe circumstances and I became destructive and violent for years. Law breaking, drug abusing, dangerous...sheesh...name it.
It took until my mid 30’s to come to terms with so many things and learn how to turn risky behavior into more healthy ventures. I know how to live a hard life, learning how to let things be easy... that is a challenge for someone with my background and temperament. Those experiences were not unique to me. So many children “fall through the cracks” in the system. Now those past moments have inspired me to make a positive difference in whatever small and large ways...that is how I cope(ish).
This week has me feeling very alone upon realizing that going home is not going to as “doable” and easy as I would like...I may have to “suck it up” in one way or another for awhile longer.





Ahhh the “Great ruinous love” I have been that woman and loved that man.
No man ever broke me more thoroughly than the nicest “most normal” one I married.
It sounds as if you made great strides to ensure her wellbeing and that is a great testament to your capacity to love.

I will never face the tough circumstance Marymc is facing and hope to be spared the pain DynamicD is experiencing (especially considering she had her own cancer to deal with during this time)

Believe, I hope a man only ever touches you with kindness and tenderness. I wish that you always have good things to believe in and that time gives you back a little more “you” every day.

It is a great honor to have read so many of these sixers so willing to share their innermost thoughts and concerns so candidly...AND for free ! ;-)

There is no measure for pain and loss. Whenever we are faced with losing another slice of love out of our lives it is painful and life changing. When our trust is betrayed it is not unusual to withdraw. When we are faced with our own mortality a moment of isolation is to be expected.
When we love deeply we may come to a moment when we grieve deeply or go beyond what we may consider humanly possible to withstand.

This is why sayings such as Gandhi’s
"A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave."
resonate so universally.

Bullitt says,

Believe, survivors rightfully carry an inner badge of strength with them forever. I am sure it has served you in many capacities throughout your life.

BA, thank you for taking time to share so eloquently your stories and your reflections on others' pain. Beautifully expressed--you must be one of those writer types. :)

By the way, I love your fiery redheaded profile picture--your pluck and guts are easy to see, girl! I also noticed your link--it looks like you've come right back to where you started in life, but this time from a place of empowerment and love. That is something to be proud of for sure.

I feel tremendously lucky to be part of this community. Thank you!

Wench says,

ba_miracle - beautifully written. Believe - I'm so sorry. =( A few days earlier, I had been kicked out of my parent's house. All my belongings were in a friend's garage and I was staying with my emotionally abusive boyfriend and his seven roommates, including my ex. They were all downstairs drinking, my ex had drunkenly said something about how he hoped I got raped (by his roommates) and I went on the roof to be alone. I was the only sober one there, it was the middle of the day, I had nowhere else to go. When I came back downstairs, one of their friends was there, also sober. He looked at me and said, "You are going to be ok." Ironically, the first lonely moment I thought of had to do with him, later in life, but right then he was grounding for me.

Wench says,

(The boyfriend I was staying with surely had contributed to the moment on the roof. He "didn't like seeing me happy" - and took my guitar away because it did, told me constantly that I didn't love him, logged my keystrokes on his computer, tried to break down the door while I was peeing, screamed at me for hugging him after I'd been in the rain and would take me on long, winding roads when he was angry and speed around the curves at 100+ mph to scare me. To this day, I'm still scared of being the passenger in fast cars.)

Bullitt says,

Wench, your story is a frightening one. I'm glad you've moved on, miss.

MariaMaria says,

When someone told me, "you look lonely"

Bullitt says,

Care to tell us more, Maria? I'd love to hear one of your stories.

SingerSomewhere says,

I should have put this in my first comment, but I didn't. While the moments that I mentioned before wesome of the ones where I felt most alone, this one wins hands down. I came home from school one day, and my mother was passed out on the couch. Only recently did I realize she was high off prescription pills. I went up stairs and did my homework, trying to forget about it. Not long after, a neighbor came in telling me "something was wrong with my mom". Turns out she had tried to drive and knocked over a fire hydrant. I had to wrestle the keys out of her hand in front of the whole neighborhood. Later, the police showed up, and it all went downhill from there. I was the only other one home at the time, I had no clue what to do, and the neighbors treated me as if I was some kind of criminal for a long time after. That's when I've felt most alone, especially since I was just a kid when it happened.

Bullitt says,

Your responses here remind me of a book called "Blackbird." Check it out. I think you'll be able to relate on a couple different levels, Singer.

Steve__Anthony says,

Winter on 1990.

Dad and mom almost died.

Girlfriend cheated on me (the day after Valentine's Day).

I quit my job.

Hurt my back and was in bed from a year. --- Alone in Savannah.

Bullitt says,

Heavy, Steve.

Sorry, pal.

canadafreeze says,

Right now. This very moment. So very alone ...

violetheart1 says,

Whenever I make a huge mistake. I don't like to share the mistake with others because that sometimes causes even more of a problem, such as if they share it or don't sympathize.
ba_miracle, I hope that I remember your words the rest of my life. It explains everything that I couldn't put together when I felt withdrawn, different, or alone. Gorgeously written.
SingerSomewhere, you have to be one of the strongest people I’ve known. The things you’ve been able to get through ever since being a kid! I look up to you.
For everyone, I feel so honored to hear what has happened in your lives. It makes every problem I've faced seem much smaller, less important. But if things like what has happened to you ever happen to me, I will know others out there who have faced and overcome the challenge.

Dhani says,

(When my buddies dumped me on a deserted California highway at night after we all had ingested LSD -this was the 60s! For hours, until dawn broke, I communicated with the stars & scary, lonely immensity of the Universe, then I 'shrunk' into a little person & talked to a spider, talk about 'lonely'...)

Wench says,

I feel pretty alone right now.

Bullitt says,

Dhani, that's quite a trip, amigo. I can't say that I wish I had been there, but it makes a great story.

illuminatrix says,

I'm just overwhelmed by reading all these comments. Powerful echos of courageous lives. I can't even commit to my own response right now, but I promise I will soon. My heart is with you all.