You get legitimately excited when butt paste is on sale. There's puke on your shirt and you know and you don't care. You catch yourself singing about poop. You can fall asleep on command - any time, any place. And watching your child learn something, laugh or smile makes you happier than anything in the universe.
Treehugger, I still do that...and my "baby" is almost 24. The mommy gene is strong.
I would say, you know you're a parent when you do that thing with spit on your finger to wipe a dirty face, you can catch puke in your hand without having it hit the floor in a department store without gagging yourself, and you can go from deep REM sleep dreaming about [insert name of hottie of choice here] to red alert awake and aware at the faintest whimper of a small voice in a distant room.
You don't quite care so much about your manner of dress. I once worked an entire day with spit-up on my tie. No one told me. That "wardrobe" you used to have becomes simply "clothes," and Banana Republic and Men's Wearhouse are replaced with Old Navy and Wal-Mart.
you know all the words to the Wiggles songs. You walk around the supermarket with a hand painted macaroni necklace around your neck. There are sticky handprints all over your kitchen cupboards.Dinner parties become lunchtime barbeques.There are new uses for your money, new priorities and a never ending selection of things to worry about. But most of all you know your heart will never be the same.
You:
- have food on your clothes
- are not afraid to use the corner of your shirt as a napkin, washcloth or tissue if necessary
- can clean up poop, vomit, and green snot without whining
- take time to sniff silk flowers because your child says they have a beautiful smell
- carry a collection small trinkets that don't belong to you (rocks, blades of grass, toys from quarter machines)
- know that the most beautiful thing IN THE WORLD is a sleeping child
You can navigate the path from your room to your kid's in total darkness and only half awake. You don't wear earrings anymore. You can stare down anyone who gives you a dirty look for nursing your screaming baby in public (I cover him up - what is your problem, people??).
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Comments
favepeep says,
You have to miss an event/party, etc that you really wanted to go to because your child is sick and you're ok with that.treehugger says,
That's a good one - I never understood when my friends left things early because their kids were tired. Now I'm a mommy, I totally get it!Wench says,
You get legitimately excited when butt paste is on sale. There's puke on your shirt and you know and you don't care. You catch yourself singing about poop. You can fall asleep on command - any time, any place. And watching your child learn something, laugh or smile makes you happier than anything in the universe.treehugger says,
Wench, you never cease to hit the nail on the head. :)You find yourself swaying in line at the grocery store... Without the baby in your arms.
Wench says,
Haha my brother-in-law was holding my son and my son was crying. Suddenly I realized I was patting my brother-in-law's back.accidentaltourist says,
Treehugger, I still do that...and my "baby" is almost 24. The mommy gene is strong.I would say, you know you're a parent when you do that thing with spit on your finger to wipe a dirty face, you can catch puke in your hand without having it hit the floor in a department store without gagging yourself, and you can go from deep REM sleep dreaming about [insert name of hottie of choice here] to red alert awake and aware at the faintest whimper of a small voice in a distant room.
Wench says,
Ugh, yes to that last part. Why can't I sleep until it's urgent - I'm biologically destined to wake up the moment he stirs. No fair!accidentaltourist says,
Although the days and nights seem endless, he will only need the reassurance of your presence for such a short time. It's a mixed blessing.treehugger says,
You accidentally answer the phone in your "baby" voice instead of your "adult" voice.Wench says,
Going out is currency. You would actually trade gold to go buy toilet paper alone. Then, when you're finally out, you miss your baby the whole time.Dean6805 says,
You don't quite care so much about your manner of dress. I once worked an entire day with spit-up on my tie. No one told me. That "wardrobe" you used to have becomes simply "clothes," and Banana Republic and Men's Wearhouse are replaced with Old Navy and Wal-Mart.Wench says,
And man, are you excited to go to Walmart for a new pair of stain-resistant shorts.KharisJo says,
you know all the words to the Wiggles songs. You walk around the supermarket with a hand painted macaroni necklace around your neck. There are sticky handprints all over your kitchen cupboards.Dinner parties become lunchtime barbeques.There are new uses for your money, new priorities and a never ending selection of things to worry about. But most of all you know your heart will never be the same.lillybrook says,
You:- have food on your clothes
- are not afraid to use the corner of your shirt as a napkin, washcloth or tissue if necessary
- can clean up poop, vomit, and green snot without whining
- take time to sniff silk flowers because your child says they have a beautiful smell
- carry a collection small trinkets that don't belong to you (rocks, blades of grass, toys from quarter machines)
- know that the most beautiful thing IN THE WORLD is a sleeping child
jl333 says,
You drive a mini van. Nothing screams 'parent' louder than this!Wench says,
You can navigate the path from your room to your kid's in total darkness and only half awake. You don't wear earrings anymore. You can stare down anyone who gives you a dirty look for nursing your screaming baby in public (I cover him up - what is your problem, people??).