What's Your Next-Door Neighbor Story?

Albert

When I was towards the end of my 2nd trimester of pregnancy, my future husband and I were sleeping on a king-sized mattress on the floor of his apartment. We shared a wall with a very very nice guy (I forget his name now) who had a great golden retriever named, Albert. Albert was a typical golden retriever; happy, gregarious, just all around lovable, until that is, his owner would leave the apartment. When Albert's owner would leave for work, errands or whatever, as soon as our neighbor got in the car and drove away Albert would start moaning this guttural sound that started out low and ended a few octaves higher. It sounded like "Marooooooooon." It was like he was dying alone in the woods, and although he had given up all hope of survival; he still had one last cry for help inside of him. But this went on everyday, for how ever long it took for Albert's owner to come home. Well not quite home. Really just until Albert saw his car. He would stop before his owner actually got out of the car, so there was no one to back up the fact that we were being driven slowly crazy by this dog. Luckily, after weeks of Albert's sad song, our neighbor realized that Albert had separation anxiety and worked hard to break Albert of that habit. It wasn't a moment too soon, because I was getting crankier and crankier with my increasing size and just the pure uncomfortable-ness of sleeping on the floor while pregnant. A few weeks later, even more pregnant and cranky I hear a high pitched "ping-ping-ping" on the wall above my head. I roll myself over on to my stomach, hoist myself up on all fours, climb my hands up the wall to get on my feet, cursing the entire time and simultaneously yelling, "What the f**k is that dog doing now?! God**mmit!" I waddle downstairs to see my husband lying on his back facing the wall throwing a ping-pong ball up against it--"ping-ping-ping." He looks at me innocently and says, "What? I do this when I'm concepting (thinking) about a new ad (he was in an advertising program at the time). I do this all day when you're at work." I just couldn't help think of how ironic it was that for weeks we were probably driving Albert crazy too.

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Have a Next-Door Neighbor Story?

As part of our new webcomic, Next-Door Neighbor, we thought it appropriate to have a little contest. Tell us your best true next-door neighbor story, and the winning tale will be matched with an artist and transformed into a webcomic and included as the final installment of Next-Door Neighbor.

About Next-Door Neighbor


No matter how close or how far, we all live next to someone, and we all have a Next-Door Neighbor story. With that in mind, editor Dean Haspiel asked some of his favorite storytellers and cartoonists to create their favorite NDN stories so we could share them with you.

The Fine Print & Contest Rules

By submitting an entry, you are granting SMITH the right to reprint or republish that entry online or in print, as well as make any necessary edits. See SMITH's terms of service for complete details.

This contest ends September 1, 2008. Prizes are not redeemable for cash and must be accepted as awarded. Winners are decided at the discretion of SMITH judges and all decisions are final. SMITH reserves the right to change the contest rules. Enter as often as you want. SMITH reserves the right to reprint or republish all entries.

 
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