My mistake, but I tried to fix it.

I chose to be happy rather than married.

I was young, stupid, and listened to people that were also young and stupid. They said I should be married, that I was growing older by the second, and that I was going to be an old maid before I knew it. I was a fool and took their words to heart. I embraced fear and settled with someone that really wasn't ready to get married. Were I to not have pushed so hard, I would have found that this person would never have made it past Go

It didn't take long to realize that I had not married for the right reasons. Marriage didn't make me happy, it just made me married. Now I was legally bound to someone I really didn't care about. However, I tried... I tried to make myself love. It worked in stories and in movies, so why not for me? Unfortunately I was the only one trying.

Six years and he made me feel worthless. No. I let him make me feel worthless. I should have never allowed it to go on that long, but I did. I married out of fear and hung onto that marriage out of fear.

Fear turned to misery, and misery turned to depression. Suicide seemed like an option, and that's when I knew I had to change my life.

And here I am on Valentine's Day. I'm in my apartment alone, but I'm happy. As for the ex, I forget he exists sometimes. Life isn't perfect, but at least I'm not living in a life of fear.


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