Say it with.....tools?
I guess nothing says 'I love you' like a plastic box full of tools from Sears.
I was cleaning out my car and I found a tool box I forgot I had. I never liked this tool box. The box itself had an awkward clamshell design. The tools were stored in the top and bottom lids of the box and most of the tools would just fall out when I opened it. I decided I didn’t want it and I threw it out.
One more thing about this tool box. It was a gift from my ex-boyfriend. This made the decision to discard it even easier.
This was not the only tool box he gave me. He gave me three. Yes, three tool boxes on three separate occasions. I guess nothing says “I love you” like a plastic box full of tools from Sears.
The second one of these is not really a box. It’s more like a portfolio that opens up to reveal a screwdriver, knife, tire gauge, pliers and a wrench. It also has a tool with multiple heads that I had no idea what it was until just now. I took a guess that it was a socket wrench, Googled that and sure enough, that’s what it was. If I didn’t know what it was until now, I know I have never used it and chances are I never will.
The third one is a small black plastic box with pliers, a screwdriver, a wrench, and assorted tools and hardware left over from assembling futons and furniture from Ikea. At least I’ve used the tiny tools that came with the furniture from Ikea.
So why did this person, someone I was involved with for such a long time, give me tools? I can assure you I never asked for tools or indicated any interest in tools. Using my astute 20/20 hindsight, I think now it was a sign that he just didn’t care. At the time I thought it was funny or quirky or something. Hm, yeah, not really. I think he was detached and I didn’t want to admit it. I can also look back on the birthday card he gave me at my 50th birthday party. He didn’t sign it. How thoughtful.
When I did ask for something, he usually didn’t get it quite right. I love dark chocolate and I told him so several times. During the last few years I would say, I like my chocolate dark, like I like my Presidents. YES I KNOW THAT IS TERRIBLY INSENSITIVE AND INAPPROPRIATE BUT AT LEAST I THOUGHT IT WOULD HELP HIM REMEMBER! What would I get? An assortment of dark and milk chocolate. I think I finally got all dark chocolate for my 53rd birthday, about a week or two before we broke up.
I’m not sure how to end this. I could say, what did I expect from dating such a tool? Groan. Or, now I know better and I have the tools to deal with relationships. Yuck. What I can say is, I’ve moved on and I am sure that I won’t be getting any more tool boxes as gifts in the future. That’s better.