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One November Night

My resolve was bolstered by the fact that the object of my affection was a straight girl.

Sitting on the couch one November night, my best friend and I were drinking margaritas. My husband and I had recently decided to get divorced, and I was talking about how long it had been since I had been kissed (quite a while) and whether I really wanted to be bothered finding someone else to kiss. The truth, of course, was that the person I wanted was sitting right next to me. Since I’ve lost a friend or two after not returning romantic interest, I was more than prepared to keep my desires to myself in the interest of maintaining our friendship. My resolve was bolstered by the fact that the object of my affection was a straight girl.
I knew that being in love with my best friend very likely meant that I would watch her date a handful of men before she fell in love. That someday I would stand on the other side of her, as maid of honor, while she wed someone else. I hoped that over time my feelings would fade; but I knew that I wouldn’t settle for someone less than her until they did. I wasn’t happy with the situation, but I was resolved. Then she turned, looked at me, and asked,
“If I kissed you, would you kiss me back?”


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