My grandparents' home was the focal point for my father's family. We would gather there for holidays, special occasions, births, deaths and most weekends. It was a place alive with voices of family members, both living and dead. With 6 uncles, 4 aunts and 25 cousins, this was not a place of quiet reserve, and my grandmother was the queen bee. I remember her most in her kitchen. And so it was there, in that kitchen, that one afternoon she gathered all the grandchildren, and in a hushed voice told us, "Listen carefully. I have something to tell you, but it is a secret. Never forget that you are of G!d's chosen people."
Having been raised from my earliest memories in the Lutheran church, I knew what that meant. But my brother and I later asked each other, "Why is our Portuguese grandmother from Puerto Rico telling us that we're Jews? And why, if she was telling us that we're Jews, did she not use the word "Jew"? Those questions would not be answered for many years. So we went about our lives, and it never struck me as anything but normal that my grandmother would light candles--for good luck--on Friday nights; that she never prepared, nor did we ever eat shellfish; that we ate pork apologetically; that mixing meat and dairy in a meal was seen as unhealthy. But there was something about my family, a culture of secrets, that I never quite understood.
After over 500 years of family secrets, the truth has been discovered. In October of 2011, I visited Portugal, touring many Jewish historical sites. I saw my surname in memorials to the victims of the Inquisition, and I was told by Portuguese Jews, "You have an old Jewish name." It was the validation of my life. Now, this Jew of Anusim Ancestors is entering the final stages of formal conversion back to Judaism. I have never felt more complete in my entire life.
SMITH Magazine is teaming up with the Jewish cultural mavens of Reboot to bring you "Six Words on the Jewish Life." From identity and mother issues to unfettered love of carbs and inner conflict over Israel—and the sheer joy of discussing and debating… everything—the Jewish life is a rich and storied topic for Jews and non-Jews alike.
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Comments
sfocisco says,
My grandparents' home was the focal point for my father's family. We would gather there for holidays, special occasions, births, deaths and most weekends. It was a place alive with voices of family members, both living and dead. With 6 uncles, 4 aunts and 25 cousins, this was not a place of quiet reserve, and my grandmother was the queen bee. I remember her most in her kitchen. And so it was there, in that kitchen, that one afternoon she gathered all the grandchildren, and in a hushed voice told us, "Listen carefully. I have something to tell you, but it is a secret. Never forget that you are of G!d's chosen people."Having been raised from my earliest memories in the Lutheran church, I knew what that meant. But my brother and I later asked each other, "Why is our Portuguese grandmother from Puerto Rico telling us that we're Jews? And why, if she was telling us that we're Jews, did she not use the word "Jew"? Those questions would not be answered for many years. So we went about our lives, and it never struck me as anything but normal that my grandmother would light candles--for good luck--on Friday nights; that she never prepared, nor did we ever eat shellfish; that we ate pork apologetically; that mixing meat and dairy in a meal was seen as unhealthy. But there was something about my family, a culture of secrets, that I never quite understood.
After over 500 years of family secrets, the truth has been discovered. In October of 2011, I visited Portugal, touring many Jewish historical sites. I saw my surname in memorials to the victims of the Inquisition, and I was told by Portuguese Jews, "You have an old Jewish name." It was the validation of my life. Now, this Jew of Anusim Ancestors is entering the final stages of formal conversion back to Judaism. I have never felt more complete in my entire life.