About Jarod Kintz
Where else, besides SMITH, would I go to read stories?
Before bed I like reading things that are written on the inside of my eyelids, until I fall asleep.
My favorite story of all time is about a man with no eyelids who has a mental breakdown after a beautiful woman winks at him from across the bar, and he doesn't know how to react.
Right now I'm reading the world's longest haiku, though it's still only seventeen syllables long. But I can confidently say that after four months of heavy reading, I am halfway through. And half of seventeen is eight-and-a-half syllables. But boy, what a half of a syllable it is!
My Favorite Stories
- Teased mercilessly, found solace in books.
By Julie Davis in Six-Word Memoirs
- Born, died, reincarnated as Shirley MacLaine.
By Julie Davis in Six-Word Memoirs
- Taking many naps, consciously avoiding reality.
By Julie Davis in Six-Word Memoirs
- Once well-fed, now starving for love.
By Julie Davis in Six-Word Memoirs
- Sanity is always within my grasp.
By Julie Davis in Six-Word Memoirs
My Stories
- Middle name’s Mouth, says it all.
- Half masochist, half sadist--tortured soul.
- Fell in love with someone else.
- Wanted nothing; did what I wanted.
- Even Webster wouldn’t dare define me.
- Played with ideas, among other things.
- Accomplished a lot, especially during R.E.M.
- Became fluent enough to hardly speak.
- Wore many masks, none for gas.
- Heard, Seen, and Dunn et al.
- Great tennis player. Never made love.
- Oddly enough, I never got even.
- I remember everything I didn’t do.
- Memory didn’t fail me, opportunity did.
- Spoke often to myself; nobody listened.
- More talent in pinkie than middle-finger.
- Couldn’t pick fights due to indecision.
- Discovered oil under sands of hourglass.
- Carried conversations like mailbag holding blackmail.
- Last in line, first to complain.
- Rode the waves like a seahorse.
- Decibel levels speak volumes about me.
- I’m quiet if you wear earplugs.
- Pinnacles were not my strong point.
- Made love like never before. Once.
- Acquired astronaut‘s helmet, stared into space.
- Same old story. Still no spine.
- Book worms catch the best fish.
- Lucky to live my whole life.
- Time flew by like a squirrel.
- Waited all my life for patience.
- I wasn’t superficial, just averagely ficial.
- Never looked back--I’m no owl.
- Time spent saved, still time spent.
- My patience surpassed only by impulsiveness.
- Wept like a baby, changed daily.
- Stood aloof laughing, a singular spoof.
- Passion enflamed my heart, like heartburn.
- Never cheated a cheat but myself.
- I gave up trying for failure.
- Wisely, I shot at Cupid first.
- So little time, so many watches.
- I never delayed in my hesitation.
- Too busy thinking to be thoughtful.
- Really great listener seeks mute woman.
More SMITH Story Projects
What can you say about love and heartbreak in six words?
Everyone has a story. Can you tell yours in six words? Submit yours to be considered for SMITH's next six-word memoir book. The first book, Not Quite What I Was Planning, is out now.