My Stories

• I, Robot.
  You, Man.
  They, Caveman.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Why do today, when due tomorrow?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What comes down, mustn't go up.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• You writin' to me? Huh? Huh?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Knock-Knock!
  Who's there?
  Who.
  The man-on-first?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My Idiot: The New Testament's "Jesus".

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• You, do to-day; I, due to-morrow.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Old bus driver causes crash
  >>>DOWNLOADS!!!<<<

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• A vowel AwAy keeps wAy AwAy.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My first kiss was her sister.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Fired secretary. She wasn't my typist.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• All that vexes live in Texas.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The Waste Land,
  Of time,
  Money.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Immanuel Kant have died a virgin.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Jesus don't want thee, Miss Sunbeam.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Doc said, "Negative." Yes, they're positive!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What's the matter, Mister Mad Hatter?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• This site really, really, really six.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Blame Teddy. Hillary should have been...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Celtics receive all my worldly possessions.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No bad muses, just bad artists.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Time doesn't heal. Learn to deal.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I liked you better as Saul.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• that. there. then. easy. me. because.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm losing my patience, Salinger. Die!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hesse, Fante, Fitzgerald, Salinger, Vonnegut, Bolano

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Steppenwolf", "Ask_the_Dust", "Tender_is_the_Night", "Franny_and_Zooey", "Bluebeard", "The_Savage_Detectives"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Notes_from_Underground", "Hunger", "Journey_to_the_End_of_the_Night", "Don_Quixote", "Hopscotch", "Post_Office"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Cortazar, Celine, Cervantes, Dostoevsky, Hamsun, Bukowski

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Proper suicides require effort. Procrastination Saves!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What quite were you planning then?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• A Moveable Feast... An Insufferable Asshole.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Perfectly calm. Calmer than you are..."

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Kill your cable. Save your soul.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• And many thanks to Carter Burwell.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I came, she yawned, we cunnilingus.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Does pissing count as a hobby?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The thing I will remember was

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Agatha Christie is Angela Lansbury's Superman.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wait 'till she hears about this...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Studies show Six-Word Memoirs cause cancer.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Better a boar than a bore.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Click here for more information>>> (HERE)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Thou shalt not say shalt not.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It's the wicked rich Kayne West!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• God told me to submit this.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Want some feedback? Find a cave.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Facebook Profile: Prohibit Posting Fat Photos

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Buttered toast is prettier than butterflies.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It won't even last a month.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Possesses a beautiful mind (organ donor???)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Schizophrenic Hermit: Symptoms of Stockholm Syndrome.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Say no to procreation!
  Free condoms?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Taking highroad doesn't guarantee free ride.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Fool with scars. Scarred by fools.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hardly any memoirs based on masturbation...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Lipstick Apology? Birth Certificate? What's Next?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Create Art. For Art Created You.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• We're given life not a choice.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• They're "sharing" unprotected SMITH-- Spreading Plagia!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Love is a curse in disguise.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Four sail: navy blues, weather poor.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• all fun, games-- 'till christians arrive

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Don't trust potential. Wish for it.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Art without Sin... Ocean without Water

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Tooth Fairy Captures Christ & Klaus

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Arrivals: Regret Desperation
  Departures: Hope Innocence

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hello Contrived Coincidences!!!
  Hello Remarkable Similarities!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It's all happened, Oprah. All 6.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Always remember! Never forget! Then what?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Once was blind, now can't breath.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Once upon a time-- That's all?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My old mentor. My new pupil.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Six Words (NOTE: Memoir NOT Included)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Have no fear, SMITH is here!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Poorly acted death scene kills filmmaker.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Lost my wisdom teeth. Found painkillers.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Share my story?
  I'd rather not.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Pleasing to the eye-- mustn't deny.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• More white-collar crime. Oh, how sublime!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Poison?- "Pick."
  Pleasure?- "Pay!"
  Progress?- "Pray..."

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Reason for living?- Same as archaea.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Kennedy announces candidacy for Heaven Senate.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Truth's in the lie of beholder.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What is this-- Grand Central Procrastination?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Mo' Reviled Left Behind (new legislation)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Good Lord! Jesus! What's your preference?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sheepish Wolf. Wolfish Sheep. Foolish Me.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• When I...
  If I...
  (Will I?)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I was 13. I'm still 13.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• More is less than more than.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Less is more than less than.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Imagine all the people... blah, blah.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• 60 Minutes (of silence)
  Don Hewitt

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Go ahead, punk, make me gay.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Life is not fair- -get acclimated.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Violence is forever," whispered the diamond.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Reality: John and Kate plus HATE

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Neighbors don't even exchange expletives anymore.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Good days are for bad people.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Jesus, keep away from time machines.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• 08/20/09, 12:37am: Happy Birthday Sister Bee!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Lust in the time of H1N1.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Pathological Liars profess: "...terrible at lying!"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She's no wiser. Me's alots dumma.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Ex-Files: I Don't Want To Believe

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Can't Read? Asshole! Asshole! Fuck You!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• 1-FortuneCookieWriter
  2-BumperStickerAuthor
  3-RefrigeratorMagnetCreator
  4-FoxNewsReporter
  5-RealtyTelevisionStar
  6-Poet

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My other memoir is a masterpiece.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Solitude works wonders, says my family.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• HEAVEN, Gospelgrad (CNN)-- Darwin cast out.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Best way to say goodbye: (poof)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The Great American Novel:
  Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Book.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• A growing immaturity?
  Just getting old.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Little white lies fade to black.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Comment: (+1) Credit.
  Publish: (-1) Credit.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Leave (1) Comment. Publish (1) Story.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Getting wise-- A most unwise thing.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Going gets tough--please, that's enough.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wish Empire State Building looked shorter.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No more dull moments, sharp knives.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Take 300 pills, call me intensive-care.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I need things to matter again.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Heaven: beautiful conversations, progressing ceaselessly.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Shh!!! (Whispers.) Fly on the wall.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I always fall short in the

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Don't hate me. I'm not beautiful.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• That jealousy doesn't match your tie.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• He's a joke without a punchline.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I love being surrounded by idiots.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Don't confuse history with his story."
  -?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Innocence is just an ignorant myth.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Martyrs should stay away from Siberia.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Jesus suffered. Judas suffers. Thank who?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The American Dream...
  The Global Nightmare...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Don't get even. Get even better.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Nobody knows anybody. Not that well."
  -Coen_Bros.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "To make a long story short..."

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• And Then There Was One: "_______"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Genies: 3 Wishes
  Smithies: 6 Words

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Life SIX and then you die.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "I Solve Problems OSU": J-Mo-P
  1-888-555-1212

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• House hunting in the breakdown lane.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Don't finish the party w/o me.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "You never learn..."
  (She never learns!)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Can't judge cereal by its box.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Left many. Missed by: hardly any.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• offended a day keeps denial away

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm dizzy from playing musical chairs.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Dreams aren't real, including American ones.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Holy Shit! Those Things Aren't Windmills!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• ALIVICIDE NOTE:
  "Afterlife Unbearable...
  ...Sweet Resuscitation!"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "It's a Wonderful Life" ~>Alternate Ending

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• HANDS UP! THIS IS A LOBBYIST!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• HMO Blew: Due$ Cost$ Few Healed

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Earth's turning...
  Humans turning their back...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My Chance: had... missed... had... missed...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Evolution is the price of immortality.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Don't ask me... "Ask the Dust"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Pseudophobia: A fear of "last cigarettes"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• OnCall: 24/7
  Compensation: This 'beeping' pager!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• perfect site to drop a stripmall

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Flushed the drugs. Killed the toilet.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm dying to finish my autobiogra-"BLAM!!!"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Last intimate companion was the flu.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Why am I laughing? No reason.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Thanks for listening...
  _{"No habla ingles"}

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• GENESIS 2:3(1/2)
  Man overslept--eighth day.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Anyone interested in becoming my nemesis?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Colored tile flooring--it's eggshell." (naturally)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Rumors about "Featured Stories" selection process

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Make-believe friend files restraining order.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Losing my insurance must've cured me.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Mind if I lose my mind?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Whaddaya say, Goliath, wanna be rich?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Children don't draw pictures of heaven.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Leave Val Kilmer out of it.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• wanna waste your life with me?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm teaching my cat to talk.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I ruined your life? I'm flattered.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Stared"!? He can't even spell A-B-Y-S-S.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Lives for nothing to live for.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Life's not fair. Hence the fairytale.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Life is good. I'm so afraid.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Writers block entrance to coffee shop.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Heroin today; beg, steal and sorrow.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Why isn't "gullible" in the dictionary?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• You had me at "Hell no"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My heart's set on Kate Moss.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• SMITH's latest: intelligent, funny, degrading, entertaining.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Know 2 flakes: bizarre and disliked.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No resistance resulted in my existence.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Earth's moon remains nameless. Moon saddened.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hey God, what's your last name?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• EMPLOYEES MUST
  RESUME WORKING
  AFTER WASHING

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Mind & Body
  Oil & Water

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Her smile required smoke and mirrors.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• it's trendy nowadays to be original

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• likely passed on last kung-fu movie

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Ali needed Frazier
  Capitalism needed Socialism

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hem's bones picked clean by magazine

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• 100 Young Americans:
  99 Leaders, Pollster.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Find teacher.
  Have them define feature.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• They're Nothing More Than "Six Slaves"!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I confess. We've been having six.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Vincent van Cheney:
  Tortured Torture Artist

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Court will hear Salinger V. California

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• gotta get-hit, gotta get-lit

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Girls stopped laughing at me. Check!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• !!!SMITH!!!
  IT'S THE NEXT
  _{LITTLE
  thing}

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Birds?! Bees?! Just name your fee...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Everybody plays the fool. No exceptions!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• NO GUARANTEE:
  Said _{fine print} Warranty.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• We'll-meet-again.
  Don't-know-where-don't-know-when.
  But-I-know-we'll-meet-again-some-sunny-day.
  Keep-smiling-through-just-like-you-always-do.
  'Til-the-blue-skies-drive-the-dark-clouds-far-away.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• They don't make 'em Nike beaucoup.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Key to Success: A Good Locksmith

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Guess who's writing a mystery memoir?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Do the Britain's have large talons?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Cries. Sighs. Lies. Buys. Neckties. Dies.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I hope you never smile again.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Your lack of honesty, my odyssey.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Birth, allow me to introduce Burial.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The Complete Idiot's Guide to Six

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Honest boys are the oddest boys.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The Giving Tree aka: Greedy Boy

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Blue Oyster Cult: Ex-Member Support Group

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I thought Miss Pacman was beautiful.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Nothingness & Omnipotence. Pick your poison.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• civic radar level kayak sees nun

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• WWLBD What would Larry Bird do?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Loved "The Wire" before everybody else!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wake up and then sleep. Repeat.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Does Hell have designated smoking areas?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Keep the ring. Lose the name.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Parrot, woodpecker, dove
  "Not birds, WORDS!"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sorry, I don't celebrate Mother's Day.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Talked about, "In Treatment", in treatment.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Look in your heart!
  What heart?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Worst possible username: The eBay Killer.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She turned around. End of story.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sibling-rivalry between the Sons of Abraham.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Showered with accolades. Soiling in self-doubt.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sorry, Noah. No shekels, no lumber.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She regifted the gift of life.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Witless? White? Bitter? Introverted? Twitter 'Litter'-ature.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Walking on water works better cold.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Know What You'll Do Next Summer!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Playing the lottery takes real skill.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I love Mazzy Star, don't you?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I imagined the greatest six-word memoir.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She regifted the gift of life.

  In Six-Word Momoirs

• Swine flu. But pigs don't fly.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I came, I saw, (insert comment).

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Catch-23!"
  "It's Catch-22."
  "Who's 22?"
  "Nothing..."

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Practice makes perfect.
  Procrastination makes pleasure.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Found him. Then lost everything else.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I tell but I never kiss.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Suggested Dosage: It's only a suggestion.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Miss happily ever after turned disaster.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My future is promising, I promise.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Bigger your carbon footprint, bigger your...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No regrets? How easily one forgets.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• UFO's, Bigfoot, Santa Claus, unconditional love...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Can't make it? Just fake it.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What did you think I meant?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I conquered, I saw, I came.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Rome,NY was built in a day.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Toilet Clogged? Call Joe The Plumber.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Part of the divorce settlement: HEAVEN

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No means no. Maybe means no.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Life begins when your dream dies.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Never pays attention to the weather.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I never grew out of it.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• US Navy SEALs capture Johnny Depp.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Cobain: Dead 15 years. Holy old.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She's happy to make my decisions.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Born 5 weeks overdue: Distressing harbinger.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• He was the world's first weatherman.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Che rises to destroy Che T-shirts.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Better get used to sleeping alone.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• First Assignment: Shakespeare
  Final Grade: F

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Would you settle for a dog?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• That's one way to kill time.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Why would I want a baby?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Zen is mightier than The Lord.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Some cool weather eased her sundae.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Self-described starving artist: 300lbs & illiterate.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• A crush on Bella and Edward.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Any new woos is good news.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Non-believers: Celebrating Good Friday utterly sadistic.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Larry and Rachel snubbed me again!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Pandora boxed me in. Inconsiderate neighbor!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wake up. Witness the trouble ensue.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Twitter me this twitter me that.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• People finally stop shouting, "Brilliant"--Brilliant!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Harmless date? You know she's late?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• War on drugs requires an intervention.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Everyone's good at something. Until now.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Forget but don't forgive. Less painful.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I forgive in order to forget.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No time for works in progress.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It's all about who they blow.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Leaving was her only intelligent decision.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The prerequisite for artistic success: DEATH

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Googles his name twice a day.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Always disappointing, meeting them in person.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "It's all over now, Baby Blue."
  -BD

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• You're being silly. Don't be silly.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "I thank the academy..." (alarmclock buzzes)

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I came, I saw, I Viagra.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She found Jesus, then lost me.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I should be ashamed of myself.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Fitzgerald's story was only five words.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Admit I have a problem? Never!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The original "Star Wars" sucked too.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Stop procrastinating. Try a seven-word memoir.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• More you learn, less you remember.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Curse God it's Friday. That's all.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Go to hell! No, not you.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Use that tie to hang yourself.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• If I only had the words...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Love finding out the hard way.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Fed plans to buy my soul.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Quite exactly what I was planning.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Searching for a six-word dating service.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Today's my last chance to win.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Baba Booey, Baba Booey, Baba Booey!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Writers write. Bad writers write poetry.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Of course I know the way.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Leave me alone! Wait...You're leaving?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Anxious? "Yes..."
  Depressed? "Definitely..."
  Angry? "NOOO!!!"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• When in doubt, shut your mouth.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Waste not, lest ye be wasted.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I removed my shoes for this???

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• SMITH Magazine presents: Six-Words Gone Wild

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• If this isn't love, it's hate.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• All dressed up, no-word to go.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Immaculate Conception? More like remarkable deception.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• In need of a good deed.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What a difference a Garnett makes.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• If this isn't the men's room...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Six-word memoirs accommodate six-second attention spans.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Miles knew that "Kind of Blue".

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Thought of you. Now I'm blue.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sniffing glue leads to low IQ.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Forget haiku. Experiment with something new.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Dostoevsky relegated to interior decorating product.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Be honest when lying to yourself.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Even public restrooms rejected his poems.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Truth failed to set Galileo free.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wished for equality. Perished. Wish granted.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Worst enemy: My memory. No remedy.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Boy becomes man. Man becomes woman.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Mistakes fertilize the mind. Harvest wisdom.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Steal idea. Borrow money. Collect accolades.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Ex-wife. Bloody knife. Jail for life.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• $1 today is worth $.95 tomorrow!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No mother. Assume she'd be disappointed.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Don't cut yourself. That's my gimmick.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Marx, Freud, Darwin, Einstein, Edison, Jung.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Stop telling me not to worry.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Six words to break my heart.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Careful now, six words sink ships.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Foreclosure victims now searching for closure.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Foreclosure Listing:
  1600 Pennsylvania Ave, WashingtonDC

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• On your marks, get set, go!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No one knows what they know.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• One more onomatopoeia and I'll shreik!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Our love was a dream...
  Zzzzzz...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I was honest... What a mistake.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Penny saved is a thousand germs.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Her divulgence obliterated a blissful ignorance.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• For Sale: Hemingway Memoir, very used.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Nobody sells drugs. They sell themselves.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Larry David, the funniest man alive.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• First comes love, then restraining orders.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Four dates. First kiss still awaits.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm waiting for my 15 minutes.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It's far worse than I imagined.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Jesus died. Thus began the fairytales.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Would somebody be me for me?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Everything makes sense when you're delusional.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Trivia Night hero. Work place zero.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wine is fine, between the lines.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Live free or die? Live free!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Road less traveled plagued with traffic.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Dying young is pretentious. Otherwise I'd...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Once upon a time I cared.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sticks and stones will... fuck yourself.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Promise you won't look? You Looked!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What did she say about me?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Lied about one thing: Being honest.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Made wish. Pissed into the abyss.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Girl's determined to regain her virginity.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Never been "The One". Never will.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hates me... Hates me... Hates me...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I loved her. She loved her.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My best friend is no dog.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Wisely fears more than fear itself.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Mother called. Stepped on cracks today.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Skills: Starting over.
  Skills: Starting over.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Grew strangely envious of the devil.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Just say no to status quo.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Parents should've returned me before opening.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Blink and you'll miss my ambitiousness.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Sin away! God's a big pushover.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• MY "CAPS LOCK" KEY IS STUCK...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Christ Almighty, I'm sweating rosary beads.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm not ugly. It's your imagination.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Female Members: Picture says 1000 words.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Carefully wishing the days away. Carefully.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Six-wordin' is my gangsta rap, biaaatch!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Accept my friend request... Or else!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Tell her I'm taller in person.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Ebay announces bid to acquire Ebay.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No sex, no drugs, no thanks.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• She found condoms in his briefcase.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• You found it where? That's strange.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Infidelities? Sweetheart, your friend is mistaken.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Do I look alright? Act normal.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• No, trust me, we've never met.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Guess who I saw last night?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The best revenge is... Who cares?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Take my story. It's non-refundable, though.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It's not plagiarism unless they're famous.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Museums to begin testing for steroids.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Asshole, stop reusing my old memoirs!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Virginity prices soar! Suicide prices sink.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Ebay outbids Ebay. Regains controlling interest.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• God's Plan is God's favorite joke.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Extinguish 401k! Gasoline prices exceed contributions.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Why waste words on that bitch?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Make wise mistakes. Facilitate revisionist history.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Lying bastards: To her, most genuine.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Honest men: To her, most deceptive.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• ATTENTION: Join SMOTH Seven-Word Memoirs.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Now I regret not regretting more.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Here's a better idea: 9 Babies!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My Joker is the best Joker.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Still searching for an attractive mirror.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It was love in no sight.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Love at fourth light: $50/hour!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It was love 'till first light.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Someday everyday will be a holiday.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• The truth hurts. So, please, lie.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Meanwhile, she acquired an eating disorder.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Live and learn. Learn to live.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• What? Huh? Excuse me? Pardon me?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Her name was such and such.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Do you remember the time we...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Straight A student won't behave prudent.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Gone today, here tomorrow... No Wait!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Here today, gone tomorrow, gone forever.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Fat man seeks wealthy, beautiful woman.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• ...doesn't kill you makes you weaker.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Trust me, it's not butter. Seriously!

  In Six Words on The Food Life

• Nothing wrong with not owning silverware.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Of course you don't look fat.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Some things never change. Other things...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I now believe it's not butter.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I finally believe it's not butter.

  In Six Words on The Food Life

• Buy books based on their covers.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Six Word Memoirs are soo 2006.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Hope! Dream! Inspiration! Togetherness! Yawn, Yawn...

  In Six Words for America

• Your predecessor couldn't remember six words.

  In Six Words for America

• Virgins always make the best mothers.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I came, I saw, I cowered.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Please, allow me to ignore you.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Jesus saves at Wal-Mart. Sunday shopper.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Just follow the yellow brick road."

  In Six Words for America

• "And they lived happily ever after."

  In Six Words for America

• Fuck! Are we allowed to swear?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• James Patterson, stop using my name!!!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm sick of these white walls.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Organized Religion: The everlasting Ponzi scheme.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Judas Iscariot: Rome's Lee Harvey Oswald.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Congratulations, Mr. President... ICEBERG STRAIGHT AHEAD!!!

  In Six Words for America

• You're a writer? You don't say...

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• "Why so serious? Why so serious?"

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• My best guess: War is hell.

  In Six Words for America

• I spell it "catsup"--tastes better.

  In Six Words on The Food Life

• Banish sound bites, political fast food.

  In Six Words for America

• Never settle for the lesser evil.

  In Six Words for America

• Told you I'd live past 30.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I wish I hadn't done that.

  In Six-Word Memoirs on Love & Heartbreak

• Crusader abandons grail for book deal.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Love languished; hate lingered; life laughed.

  In Six-Word Memoirs on Love & Heartbreak

• Stop appointing lobbyists. You promised, no?

  In Six Words for America

• Stop celebrating. Real work lies ahead.

  In Six Words for America

• We need more than good intentions.

  In Six Words for America

• Outsource the presidency, like everything else.

  In Six Words for America

• They love me. I get fat.

  In Six-Word Memoirs on Love & Heartbreak

• Six words on love? One's plenty.

  In Six-Word Memoirs on Love & Heartbreak

• Grow up? I write--why bother?

  In Six-Word Momoirs

• Fine, leave! But the gun stays.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• A wise man left much unsaid.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• It takes talent to waste talent.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Dinosaurs wonder what killed the humans.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Art is dead. I'm turning back.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Family dinners and love life withers.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Fact: I hate you, the reader.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'd gladly end it for everyone.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• This is only a test, right?

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I'm about to burn my bible.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I've had worse and will again.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I used to love you, Love.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Stop typing! Why? Because you're boring!

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• I wish my name wasn't Joe.

  In Six-Word Memoirs

• Life... 2... 3... 4... 5... Death?

  In Six-Word Memoirs