Jennifer Aniston Is Doing Great
As if in slow motion, the blonde leaned in toward Lisa and they reached out and held each otherâ€™s forearms for what seemed like 10 long seconds.
The pressure is always on when members of my _famiglia_ come to town. They want Mr. Fancypants to show them a good time, because they think I live a totally charmed life as an underpaid freelance writer. For a good vibe and great food, I like to take them to Babbo down on Waverly, with hopes that celebrity chef and owner Mario Batali will walk by in his orange clogs and give them a wink.
One night a few weeks ago, my mom and sister Lisa had just come from a wine tasting and were most definitely a little buzzed and very, very hungry. While we waited for a table in the crowded bar area, the restaurantâ€™s manager (an old pal of mine) walked over with a bottle of Barolo, three glasses, and a plate holding three slabs of bruschetta adorned with melting slices of _lardo_. â€œA little something on the house,â€ he said with a smile, knowing exactly why I was there. I was feeling good. Mom was beaming. And so we huddled in the corner and wolfed down creamy cured pork fat with copious sips of the delicious wine, hardly saying a word.
And then it happened.
I glanced up at Lisa, who was staring over my shoulder toward the dining room, eyes wide and smiling. But before I could turn around, a sheath of perfectly straight, Pantene-shiny blonde hair was passing me and I heard Lisa gasp. Then, as if in slow motion, the blonde leaned in toward Lisa and they reached out and held each otherâ€™s forearms for what seemed like 10 long seconds.
Lisa said, â€œHow are you?â€ with such deep feeling, I figured this was an old friend she hadnâ€™t seen in years.
The blonde said, â€œIâ€™m okay, Iâ€™m okay.â€
And with that she walked out, followed by her entourage of three hot bodies, not one of whose lovely faces I ever beheld.
When I asked her who that was, she blushed and said, â€œJennifer Anistonâ€¦itâ€¦wasâ€¦Jennifer Aniston!â€ After a gulp of Barolo, Lisa explained she had caught sight of the worldâ€™s most famous blonde walking toward her, but that Aniston gave her a serious look that said, "Please donâ€™t make a scene." They locked eyes and then â€œshe smiled and she walked toward me,â€ said Lisa, explaining how she felt so bad for the star, given the whole Angelina Jolie thing, that she just had to say something.
â€œThat was unbelievable,â€ said Mom.
â€œI canâ€™t believe I just hugged Jennifer Aniston,â€ said Lisa.
Technically, it was a forearm grip. Yet undoubtedly, that nightâ€™s mission was accomplished.