The best writers don’t hold back. They not only tell the stories most of us don’t normally reveal, but they do it well. I was thinking about this while I read Factotum by Charles Bukowski. The guy told his hard luck, hard drink, hard women stories in a brutally honest and straightforward way, with a poetic charge careening masterfully at the end of every line.

What got me reading Bukowski again recently was watching the Born Into This documentary. I wrote about that at 52projects.com. You watch that documentary and think, How did he get all that writing done?

The answer, or at least one answer to that question, is in his poem “So You Want to Be A Writer?”:

“if it doesn’t come bursting out of you,
in spite of everything,
don’t do it.”

And in terms of not telling the story, the poem covers that as well:

“if you first have to read it to your wife
or your girlfriend or your boyfriend
or your parents or to anybody at all,
you’re not ready.”

The first ten people who leave a comment about Bukowski (and come on, we all have a thought or feeling about Bukowski and his writing, a favorite Bukowski book, a “how I discovered Bukowski” tale), will get a free copy of Factotum.

Summer Pierre has got a very cool personal media project going on at her site, an inspiring challenge to herself: A Something, An Anything for 30 Days. She’s creating an image a day (featuring wonderful, memory-based stories) on an 8.5 X 11 piece of paper with a felt-tip pen. You can see the gallery of images here, but be sure to read through the blog as well, because each posted entry also features excellent commentary on both the image and the overall project by Summer.

I love the stories Bruce Springsteen tells in his songs. I came of age when “Born in the USA” was all the rage, and I didn’t know until years later what that song was about. What seemed to be a patriotic anthem was instead a protest song, a shouting critique of the way Vietnam veterans were treated in this country. The story can be told, but you can easily miss the point, because of youth, or ignorance, because you’re just not paying close enough attention, because you refuse to hear the message. I recently was given The Essential Bruce Springsteen collection, and was listening to disc 2, to hear some of those Born in the USA songs, to go back in time and rock to the music of my youth. I was just hanging out and doing busy work around the apartment when “American Skin (41 Shots)” came on about an hour into the album. That is the song about the police shooting of Amadou Diallo, a horrifying, devastating tragedy that occurred in NYC in 1999, an incident that put the spotlight on the horrors of police brutality and racial profiling. I remember how controversial this song was, and how the controversy came to a head when Springsteen and the E Street Band played it live at sold out shows at Madison Square Garden in 2000. I didn’t miss the point of this Springsteen song — And yet, based on the reactionary response six years ago, many people were missing the point, or taking it the wrong way, or reacting in a way that put up walls. The story can be told, but someone’s always going to miss the point, or take it the wrong way. And that’s all the more reason to tell the story.

Sex stories. Now man, there have to be so many sex stories that go untold. I’m talking honest, real sex — everything from the tender moments to the horrific horror stories. These stories are “private.” They’re “just between us.” “I don’t kiss and tell,” people say. I know in conversations with your best friends or new lovers or whatever, you might get into the details. The nasty details, the laughable details, the my mind was freak’n blown details — still though, people hold back. And yes, I’m aware of all the erotica sites, but in terms of real people talking about real sex (and not selling a $15 a month subscription or some kind of product) and putting their names on the dotted line, they’re just isn’t that much out there, even in this day of the anything goes internet. (and before the internet, what was there — Little Birds by Anais Nin and Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller?)

One person who does put it all out there is Rachel Kramer Bussel — who, among many other things, writes the Lusty Lady column for the Village Voice. I was thinking about this one column she wrote about having hot sex with a porn director, and in particular, this exchange:

“The sex was rough, intense, and powerful, the kind that may be routine for him but made me convulse–and squirt. I was overwhelmed. I asked, ‘What are you doing to me?’

‘Fucking you the way you should be fucked,’ he said truthfully.”

Now that seemed very honest, and sort of ridiculous, and very real, because, come on, it’s frenzied sex talk. But my point here is, Rachel put it down on paper and it was published in the Village Voice with her name on the byline.

I asked her how she felt when she wrote that column, and how she factors in the fact that her words are going to be published and out there for all to see. Here’s her response:
(more…)

All that hype! And now they’re saying Snakes on a Plane bombed at the box office. It’s possible that a basic fear of snakes kept people away. They just didn’t want to watch an entire movie with snakes slithering around (on an airplane no less) — like watching a 90-minute version of that scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Well, my theme here at SMITH has been the stories we do not tell, and of course fear is probably the main reason why we hold back — fear of telling too much, fear of what people might say or think of you, fear of getting it wrong, fear of having to just say it out loud or truly commit to writing it down on paper. But let’s keep this light! Snakes on a Plane light! I’ve got 10 copies of the Snakes on a Plane Quote Book, so the first 10 people who leave a comment about 1) how they felt about the Snakes on a Plane hype, 2) their fear of snakes, 3) why they didn’t go see the movie OR 4) What they thought of the movie because hell yeah they saw it, will get a free copy of the quote book. I do wonder if we’ll even get 10 comments. We may already be at the “I don’t ever want to hear about Snakes on a Plane again!” point.

Staying with the theme of the stories we do not tell, one way that we do tell them is anonymously. I can think of no other web project that has explored this concept better than Postsecret. I think pretty much everyone knows about this website, but if you haven’t seen it or haven’t checked in on it in awhile, it’s always worth a visit. The image and usually just a sentence or two on the featured postcards are often haunting and thought-provoking. I often find myself either personally identifying with the confession in some way, or feeling like I really want to know more of the whole story. Some I just raise my eyebrows and shake my head and then try to forget, because they are so chilling. The stories we do not tell… or how we tell the stories that we are afraid to tell. Those are often the best stories, the ones that have the most to offer, the ones with the deepest and most moving insights.

So here’s the deal. I have two copies of the Postsecret book to giveaway. The first two people who leave a relevant comment on this post (not just “First” or something like that), we’ll mail you a copy of the book. Make sure you provide an email address in the email address field when you comment so we can get in touch. (Your email will not be made public).

Glad to be guest-blogging here at SMITH. I’m Jeffrey Yamaguchi, and I run a site called 52Projects.com. The site is all about projects and project-making. I stray into personal areas, such as a love of the music of John Denver, but for the most part, I don’t get too personal. But recently, I got sick and had to have some medical tests done, and after it was all said and done, I really wanted to write the story. But did I want to post the story on my site? That I was not so sure about. For the first time, I really thought about the lines I draw in terms of what I would put on my site. So that’s what I wanted to blog about here at SMITH — the site that celebrates the fact that everyone has a story. I totally agree with that sentiment. What I’ll spend some time blogging about here is the stories we do not tell. Or think about not telling, or worry about telling, or tell and then wonder if the story should not have been put out there…

I did end up posting the story — You can read it here: “A Trip to the Urologist, Or, Damn That Prostate.” Before I did post it, I shared the piece with a few friends and colleagues, and they all said go for it. That was encouraging, and yet I was very nervous hitting that “Publish” button. In my mind, there was going to be all kinds of reaction… But there wasn’t. Still, I believe it’s a story that will be helpful, even it features perhaps “too much information.”

Here’s an excerpt, to show an example:

Did I mention that the nurse was quite attractive? I’m noting this not because it was some kind of turn-on (I didn’t just feel asexual, I felt anti-sexual during my time at the urologist’s office), but because it seemed to make the whole situation much more embarrassing. I know this makes me sound like a pig, but I would have rather had some old school, grey-haired grandmothery-type in the room. A grown man naked from the waist down with his penis shrunk down well below the “I was in the pool” level, whimpering, “Will it hurt?” — Now that’s the last way you want to be seen in front of a young, gorgeous woman. Get Nurse Marge in the room, STAT!

Any bloggers or writers out there who have written stories or posted blog entries where they really weren’t sure that it was a story they should tell? Stories that you’ve held back on? Comments are welcome.